I can't believe this is my 500th post!
Who knew I would have this much to talk about?
LOL oh yeah...When do I ever shut up?


Why did I start blogging?
My BFF Nikki encouraged me to do it. I am a writer, always have been. I have single handedly kept notebook companies in business. And have a small library of FULL notebooks.
My life has been hard, most of my life. And I never had anyone to talk to about it. I was never asked as a child how I was, or how I was feeling, What I was thinking, I wasn't even encouraged to have my own opinion. A dear friend saw me crashing and burning at 9, which was the first time I tried to commit suicide. She taught me how to express myself. And I instantly fell in love with writing. Nikki knew what I needed was to connect with others who wrote too, and she begged and threatened me into giving blogging a try. And because of her I have all of this. I have many followers, product reviews and most importantly... Many blogging friends!! Some of you visit with me every day, via phone calls, texts or Facebook. And I love you all!!

Why do I write poetry?
When I first started writing my parents didn't notice. But when a teacher brought it to their attention, my writing books became a weapon for them to use. They would ransack my room looking for them and then read them. Then every line I wrote was a punishment.
An English teacher I had introduced me to Shakespeare and Kavanaugh and Poe and I fell in love with writing sentences in such a way that they only had true meaning to me. My parents would still read what I wrote, and I would still get into trouble, but never for what I actually did!

What's my favorite part of blogging?
COMMENTS!!!
No seriously....they are crack to any blogger. It's why I turn my phone on in the morning...To check my email!
But better than the comments are the friends I have made!


What do I feel is my greatest blogging accomplishment?
Aside from 500 posts? It's becoming the Royal Vet!! DUH!
I have been able to encourage my Friend Jena to start blogging as well!
And finding that I had the courage all along to talk about the tough subjects.

Advice I would give to newbie bloggers?
Don't write for followers. Don't write for anyone or anything but you. When you are true to your writing the followers who can connect with what you say will find you.
And Use Spell Check!!! It's there for a reason.

I'm proud that, for the most part, I write what I want, I write for me, and I write to discover more about myself. And through this Blog I have grown and matured and I find new places to improve myself every day.
I have found my strength and encouragement through this blog.
And unlike a note book....It will be here to see me through the next chapter of my life, my next 500 posts!

Today, June 21st/2010, is the Summer solstice, First Day of Summer, the longest day of the year, AND my 7 Year Wedding Anniversary.
7 years.
All I can picture is those two stupid kids we were, saying our vows at 4 am to the justice of the peace in Vegas.
When I look back at my life as a whole piece it seems very empty. So many people have come in and out of my life. No one has ever stayed long enough.
I know how to push people away. And I knew that Seth would leave me at some point. So I didn't fully let him in. I knew that if I kept myself one carefully measured step back, that when he left it wouldn't hurt so much. I didn't ever realize that by keeping him out I was actually pushing him away. It broke my heart the day I realized he wasn't leaving me, that I was shoving him out the door. And it's been one of the hardest lessons I have learned.
I remember feeling distraught when we admitted to each other that we were not the people the other one needed. And feeling very scared when we decided to try to make it work anyways. Seth is not perfect. But when he decided to change he really did it. And in promising to follow his lead I have made changes too. And slowly we are turning ourselves into the person that the other one needs. It's been a hard 7 years. But I am glad to have gone through it with someone who will fight as hard as I do. And who is still able to surprise me with new things about himself.
In some ways I can even say that my disease has helped us in growing closer. It's made me lean on him and ask help from him in ways that I never would anyone else. And I can honestly say that if I ever lost him I would be a broken woman.
When I left my home my parents told everyone how much happier they were without me. That I made them miserable. 7 years and Seth is happy. Even on the days when I am a huge pain in the ass, he still loves me. He has been by my side longer than anyone else I know. lol he holds the record! And all he has ever told anyone else is that I have made his life better. That heals my heart.
7 years. We have packed so much life into 7 years that I am not sure what else is out there for us!
Happy Anniversary Seth. Thank you for the last 7 years.