Burning

I can't seem to look away.

Watching our life go down in flames.

Staring in disbelief that this is happening to me.

You spend all of your time waiting for a second chance.

You put us on hold to find what you really wanted.

Always reaching out for the next shiny toy, that you got caught up in the moment.

I'm covered in bruises and scratches, but no one can leave unscathed right?

No one, except you.

You and your secrets and your private life away.

You always think it will be better with some one else, that you can be free to do what you want and be who you really are.

But the truth is that it's only better with someone who sees the You you're always trying to hide, but loves you anyways. The person who chooses to look you in the eye every day, even though they know you are not being honest with them. The person who chose to build their life around you. 

You can't ever recapture this.

Until you realize that, you will try over and over and fail and fail.

And while you're out, trying to find yourself, and have your fun, I am watching us burn.

You've left me all alone and I am stuck here, watching us burn.

And while the fire is beautiful, it hurts.

It burns and shreds me in a glorious pain and makes me feel so hollow that I want to wrap myself around the fire and let it fill me up.

I can't save us, but I'm going down with it.