What I meant to Say Wednesday!

If you haven't joined a WHAT I MEANT TO SAY WEDNESDAY you are missing out!
Remember when you sat in the parking lot for what seemed like an hour waiting for a parking spot, and just as someone pulls out and you think it's yours some idiot pulls in an snakes it from ya. And you mumble under your breath and drive off to park in Timbucktu? Unless you're CB of course, who gets out of her car and screams till they move, you probly had in your head what you Meant To Say!
POST IT HERE!
Here are mine to get you started!
1. To the idiot children outside, who's parents don't give a rat's arse what you do, when you returned Caden's toy this evening, that you ripped from his hands this morning and claimed to throw over a fence, and I looked at you with daggers and mumbled "thank you" What I meant to say was, mess with me again and I will bend you over my knee and beat you with a fence post. And tell your momma if you don't straighten out She's next!
2. To Seth's boss who paid for half the towing fee's so that we could get my car back: When I smiled at you and said "Thanks so much for taking the time out to meet with me and for helping me with this." What I meant to say is How stupid do you think I am? This car is in our lease and it has been here for 2 years. Don't give me some crap about how you couldn't find the owner! And you don't have the money to pay for this? Hussy you own 3 hummers! Just bought your son a new truck and have enough diamonds on one hand to feed the entire apt complex of which you own. But thanks so much for making me come down here and argue you into doing the right thing and then screwing me over anyways!
3. To my dog: When I say GO PEE that does not mean sniffing every rock and tree in the yard for half an hour. You were just out there 2 hours ago and nothin has changed. I promise! Do your business and get your butt back into the house or I'll turn you into a pair of slippers!

Now I know ya'll want to get in on the fun... So what are you waiting for?