This isn’t about ultimatums—it’s about the reality that comes with loving me.
I don’t compete, nor do I come in as a savory consolation prize when what you really wanted remains just out of your grasp.
This isn’t to say that I plan on placing you under lock and key—because I don’t.
I don’t know what tomorrow’s sunrise will hold, and I remain unsure about where our journey will lead us and if that means we will someday choose to belong to each other. But, what I do know more certain than anything, is that you have a choice to make one day: to either be with every woman in the world or to be with me.
I’m not meant to be one of many, and in truth you’ll never fully know the wonder of my world unless you choose to step into it with me. I’m not meant to be taken in small doses, in moderation, so as to not overdose and lose your bearings in a futile attempt to play it safe. Whether you see it or not, I’m the kind of woman that men spend their whole lives looking for. I’m the urban legend, the stuff of tales between fathers and sons, and the irony that the woman their mother told them to be wary of is the very same kind their father told them to find.
I know my worth, although perfection is not a word that will ever be used to describe me, or my behavior. But I wasn’t put on this earth to be flawless, but to be so real that I could bring you to your knees with just a single look. I want you to feel me from the roots of your hair to the tips of your toes. I want my energy to dance through you and send ripples through your muscles, reminding you that the only people that find magic are the ones who are crazy enough to believe it exists.
Perhaps you don’t see any of that though—and if that’s the case, then you should choose everyone else; anyone else but me.
The only man who deserves to share my bed and my life, is also the one who knows this. The one who loves me as much as I bother him, but who sees my value every day, regardless of what it might bring. I’m not going to convince you, or beg you, or wait for you, or even chase you. All I am saying is that I’m not meant to be shared and the only way for you to really understand what life would be like by my side is to actually stand with me for a bit and see what way the wind blows when we come together.
Life is a riddle, and the punchline rarely makes sense.
Yet, whether you are in my arms or not, you’re still with me each evening. Too much has transpired between us, and in truth, I don’t think will ever be the same again. You changed my life—you came in and helped make it possible for me to fall in love with myself. My life is better because you are in it. Maybe it doesn’t add up that I’ve never questioned my place in your life, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t wondered.
Just because I don’t ask for something, doesn’t mean I don’t want it.
Perhaps that is my problem all along; I never ask for anything from anyone. I never ask you to love me, or to only be with me. I never ask you to do anything—but one day it will be time for all that to change.
I think that you could have a perfectly wonderful life without me, and you could spend your nights with different women, sharing your bed and fantasies. Maybe there’d even come a day when you forget about me all together, and I become nothing more than a faded memory that brings a smile to your lips.
But wonderful doesn’t always mean worthwhile.
As much as I think you would be fine without me, I think you would be even better with me—I think both us would be better for it.
I think that sometimes, something special comes along and proves why every tear, every hardship, every challenge is worth it. To me, you’re that something special.
I’ll never pretend that you don’t mean anything to me, because I can no longer imagine being with anyone else. But I don’t know what the future holds or if someday I’ll have to do just that.
But I am here, in this shaking moment, and as terrified as I still am at having my life changed and broken—I am ready to be yours.
I’m ready to throw the dice and lay my heart on the table because there isn’t anywhere else I would rather be than with you.
So, you can have any woman in this beautiful world or you can have me. My heart, my life, and my body—all of me. No pressure though. For the man who truly sees me, this will be the easiest decision in the world. The thought of me kissing someone else other than him would be too much to take, and so whether he knew all the answers or not, the one thing that he would be sure of is that he couldn’t let me go.
And so maybe you will decide that I’m better off with someone other than you—but I’m kind of hoping you don’t.
In reality you could be with any woman in the world, but why choose that, when you could be the one who has me?