Thursday, April 22, 2010

Still grieving.

Yesterday was the one year anniversary of the Death of my Best Friend Shirley.
She passed away from a combination of Breast Cancer and Diabetes.
Tuesday I went to the cemetary where we scattered her ashes. Her family has still not been able to pay for any sort of marker, even though Shirley reserved a spot for one right above her husband's marker.
So I took one of the cards I had made for her memorial service and placed it below her husband's placard and took pictures to send to her daughter in Germany.

Shirley Kay Lindgren
Born: July 24, 1945
Passed: April 21, 2009


On the ledge of the wall you can see a little Squirrel who I made friends with. He would take berries and crackers that I left on the wall. So mischevious..Shirley would have loved him!

Even though it rained most of the morning I had beautiful weather.


There is a tree that grows right above her husbands placard, aso I took some twine and wrapped her picture right above it, and placed her lilly in it. The man at the cemetary said they would be respectful and leave it up for me and anyone else who came to pay their respects.


One whole year has gone by.
Seems impossible.
How has life continued without her?
I still miss her today as much as I did when I was sitting in her room waiting for the funeral home to come and collect her.
I was planning on holding a dinner in honor of her this weekend. I was going to cook all of my friends all of Shirley's favorite foods. But I cancelled it.
I can't handle seeing anyone.
I don't even want to talk to anyone.
I don't want to eat and I can't sleep.
It feels as though I lost her all over again.

3 comments:

Bernadine said...

This was a very sad post.

They say time heals everything.

Laina said...

I'm sorry for your loss.
Allowing yourself to feel and express those sad emotions helps the soul and the wounded heart to heal.

Uranidiot said...

Honey that first year sucks. I can promise you that time softens the edges,, so the pain is not so sharp. I thought I would die on the anniversary of his death. but I made it through, and I marked it as the end of the year of firsts,,, and I've started to move on...

You know I love ya..