All The Words

I want to be selfish.
Which I suppose means I am already being selfish.
Is there a selfless way to be selfish?
I think if their was I would have found it by now.

I didn't think there was any part of my heart left to break.
Numb to the pain I was already living in, falling for you makes me bleed fresh.
And now I see I have been trapped in my own shadow.

And what I wanted was to see your strong hands vowing never to leave my own.
Oh my tears burn!
And yet...if I can't make myself happy how can anyone else?

A thousand sentences fill my head but none of them will come out to meet you.
Somehow I can't seem to write what I want.
All the words I wish your fingers could feel.
All the time I've wished you could know the silent sorrow,
lying stiff in my throat like broken teeth.

I wish you could speak to my fear.